Beautiful Disaster
by xSlytherclaWx
Summary: Songfic to Kelly Clarkson's famous song. JillEustace one shot... not much more to say, except that it's pretty much rubbish.


_**Beautiful Disaster **_

_**By NarnianAslan**_

_**A One-Shot**_

**_Author's note: Okay my keyboard is acting wonky/Crazy, so if there are any capitalization errors that's my keyboard. Okay, so that's that. SONG LYRICS BELONG TO KELLY CLARKSON, not me. Jill and Eustace are both thirteen in this fic. BTW this is Jill/Eustace. However, that is in the summary so… _**

_**Your authoress,**_

_**Pippa**_

_He drowns in his dreams,_

_An exquisite extreme, I know,_

_He's as damned as he seems,_

_And more heaven than a heart could hold._

Jill Pole watched Eustace sleep. She knew she probably shouldn't, but it was _his_ idea that she spend a week this summer, along with his cousins, Lucy and Edmund. Eustace was tossing and turning in his sleep, and Jill knew she couldn't wake him, as much as she wanted to. What would she say? She was watching him sleep? That sounded almost as crazy as she felt. Jill decided to go back to bed and forget that thought, though she couldn't get the image of Eustace sleeping out of her head.

_And if try to save him,_

_My whole world could cave in,_

_It just ain't right,_

_It just ain't right._

Jill thought of how unhappy Eustace looked whenever his parents were around. _Almost as unhappy as he was in the Experiment House_, Jill thought to herself. She was sitting on a chair in the room she and Lucy shared. She knew she had made the right decision to visit Eustace, even though his cousins seemed like a great help to him. She knew that she had to help him, somehow. But she couldn't think of a way that would continue to conceal her own feelings for him. _But what _do _I feel for him?_ Jill asked herself. If only it wasn't so hard. She had watched him sleep the night before, and she couldn't meet his eyes since Narnia. Lucy had asked if Jill fancied Eustace, the day before, when Jill had arrived (in private of course, Lucy wasn't mean, as you know) and Jill answered that she didn't know. "But if I did, I'd tell you," Jill had told Lucy. _If only I _did_ know,_ Jill said miserably to herself.

_Oh, and I don't know,_

_I don't know what he's after,_

_But he's so beautiful,  
such a beautiful disaster._

"Jill? Are you in here?" a voice came from outside of the door. Jill recognized it as Eustace.

"Yes, you can come in."

Eustace entered. "Jill, I need to talk to you."

"Alright, what did you want to talk about?"

"Well, to be honest, I want to talk about us."

Jill felt queasy. "Us?" she asked faintly.

Eustace nodded, and he bit his lip. "Us."

_And if I could hold on,_

_Through the tears and the laughter,_

_Would it be beautiful?_

_Or just a beautiful disaster?_

"Jill, I have to ask you something, answer honestly. I'm your friend, and I won't get mad at your answer."

"What's the question?" Jill asked, as calmly as she could.

"Do you like me?"

"Of course I like you! You're my best friend."

"No, I mean do you _like_ me? Do you fancy me?" Eustace asked Jill.

"Oh. I-I-I don't know, I really don't. I mean, I-I-I'm so confused, Eustace."

"I am too, Jill," he said as he hugged her.

"I don't get it. Why can't it be any easier?" Jill asked, her voice breaking.

"I don't know. But it isn't going to be."

_He's magic and myth,  
as strong as what I believe,_

_A tragedy with,_

_More damage than a soul should see._

The next day, Jill, Lucy, Edmund, and Eustace were reading in the living room. Eustace's parents were out for the time being and they were told to read. They couldn't do anything else. Jill looked up from her book, _Pride and Prejudice _by Jane Austen. She glanced over at Eustace. He looked at her with a gentle look that made Jill's heart skip a beat. She couldn't believe how often Eustace was on her mind. It seemed like every moment. Jill closed her book and stood up.

"Eustace, could I talk to you for a minute?"

Eustace looked surprised. "Uh, sure. How about in my room?"

"Alright." So Jill got up and followed Eustace into his room. Once there, she began talk.

"Eustace, I think I know the answer to the question you asked me yesterday."

_And do I try to change him?  
So hard not to blame him,_

_Hold on tight,_

_Hold on tight._

"Okay," said Eustace, letting Jill take her time.

"I must have known it deep inside all along. I mean, I wasn't sure, but now I am. I realized it just today. When you looked at me while we were reading. I knew it then, as if I had always known it. The answer was so obvious it seemed strange that I didn't know what it was sooner. I suppose I did, I was just ignoring it for the fact that it might ruin our friendship."

"So you have an answer?" Eustace asked.

Jill nodded. "It's kind of obvious. You might laugh."

_I'm longing for love and the logical,_

_But he's only happy hysterical,_

_I'm waiting for some kind of miracle,_

_Waiting so long, so long._

"I won't laugh at you, Jill. I promise."

"I do. I do fancy you, Eustace. I can't believe I just noticed it today. I mean it was obvious."

"How so?" Eustace asked.

"Well, for one, I couldn't look into your eyes after Narnia, until now. And I also watched you sleep the night before last."

"You did?"

"Yes, and I wanted so bad to wake you, you were tossing and turning, but then I thought what would I say?" Jill laughed at her own foolishness.

"Well you could have told me the truth. I would have understood."

"I didn't think you would."

"That's beside the point. You fancy me, and, I, fancy you."

"So what are we going to do?" Jill asked.

"Well, I was thinking if I could ask you to be my girlfriend."

"Well then ask me."

"Jill," Eustace started, "Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Of course!"

_He's soft to the touch,_

_But frayed at the ends he breaks,_

_He's never enough,_

_And still he's more than I can take._

The goodbye was terrible for both Jill and Eustace.

"But look on the bright side," Jill said to Eustace, about five minutes before she was due to leave.

"What?"

"School's in a week, and we'll get to see each other then."

"I suppose you're right," Eustace sighed, "It's just, I don't want to be without you for a week and it is _school_, with _Them_, even though I'll get to see you again, it's just,"

"I understand what you mean. I'm not looking forward to _Them_ anymore than you are. But we're to have a new Head. So I doubt they'll bother us too much."

"You're right."

"Jill!" came Lucy's voice from downstairs, "Your mum's here!"

"Be right down!" Jill told her, then she turned to Eustace, "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too:" Eustace said and then her kissed Jill on the cheek.

"I should go. Bye!" Jill said to him as she grabbed her suitcase and headed downstairs.

"Bye," Eustace said in response.

_He's beautiful,_

_Such a beautiful disaster._

Next term was great, and Jill and Eustace were still best friends as well as boyfriend and girlfriend.

**_Authoress' Note: Aww… that was sweet… That was just because I lost my inspiration on Dance With Me, so why not go on another bit of inspiration for Jill/Eustace. I might even answer my own challenges. Come on people! If you like it so much write some! Or at least review._**

_**Pippa**_

**_P. S. If this is a little… well, bad… it's because I wrote it at intervals between 9:30PM and 2:00AM._**


End file.
